Gap Baby

Aidan is more socially conscious than your average mullet-sporting individual.

RYANNNNNN!!!!

Alright Trista, I feel like I can be honest with you. I endured the whiny baby voice on The Bachelorette. I saw you get married in that inadvisable Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman hairstyle. I rolled my eyes as you mixed the pink and blue sand during your vows...but now I feel that I have to speak up.

My UsWeekly usually brings me great joy, but reading about how a woman who weighs 116lbs can't feel good about herself until she gets back down to 106lbs makes me want to cancel my subscription. This whole article was soooo annoying. Do every one who has ever eaten a sandwich a favor and keep your "problems" to yourself.

LOVING the cool weather!

I had to go buy a few sweat suits this week. All of Aidan's winter wear is still huge on her. I am happy to report that she is gaining weight. The formula switch has agreed with her and she's seemed much happier. On the downside, her poop smells like the monkey house at the zoo.

Cute or sad?

Here is Aidan with another one of her favorite things, her Gloworm.

Apparently she has decided that if I won't nurse her than she is just going to have to find someone who will.

This picture took awhile...

Here is Aidan with my parents/sisters dog Salma. She is the sweetest dog and she's been spending a lot of time at our house when my Mom babysits. This is the closest we could convince her to get to Aidan. She has a healthy fear of those little hands that are just itching to pull some fur.

How would she react to Nair?

I'm not going to lie, it's been a while since my legs have been shaved. (Do you like how I said that, like someone else should be shaving them?) Aidan has a special super power. She can see through the shower curtain and know exactly when I pick up the razor. She will play happily in her bouncy seat, but the second the razor gets picked up she has a sudden hysterical need for my shower to end.

While I appreciate her concern for my safety, and the extra warmth provided as the weather turns colder, this shaving standoff needs to end.

Halloween Preview

I tried Aidan's Halloween costume on. I went ahead and took pictures just in case she's in a bad mood on Halloween :)

Bottle safety

Since I've made the switch to mostly formula I've been doing a lot of reading on all of the new info about bottles made with BPA and their safety. I would encourage you to do the same. It may not be as much of an issue for those who primarily breastfeed but now that I am mostly bottle feeding I am not going to take any chances. I feel like a majority of bottle companies are not being completely honest or proactive about these new developments. I know that some of these things can be overblown but once you start reading there is a TON of info on the subject. Also the people that are saying it's not a problem like the JPMA, are people who make money off of selling these products so it's hard to not wonder about their impartiality.

What tipped the scales for me is that Baby Bargains, a very well known and respected book on baby gear and products has revoked their endorsement of BPA containing bottles. This includes major brands such as Avent and Dr. Brown's that I know most people use.

We had been using Medela (which are BPA free) and Avent. I am throwing away our Avent bottles. It's just not worth the risk.

The Baby Bargains blog has a lot of info on the subject, including the fact that some of the companies are set to start making BPA free bottles as early as next year. This leads me to believe that they know there is a problem. Why else change?
http://baby411.typepad.com/babybargains/bottles/index.html

Born Free Bottles

With a lot of things like this I'm just like well, you can't protect yourself from everything that's bad for you, but this goes in her mouth several times a day and will be heated over and over again.

I just feel like everyone should be informed on the topic so they can make their own decision.

Working those opposable thumbs...

Aidan can almost put her pacifier back in her mouth without our assistance. It won't be long now until she's mastered the violin and French cooking.

New favorite hobby...

Lip grabbin...

Feeling like a big fat failure...

We went for Aidan's 4 month appointment this morning. Aidan squeaked in at 10lbs. She has dropped off her growth chart. Dr. Stephens had to give me a little tough love and say that it's time to switch to formula. She needs to gain weight and my milk supply is getting worse and I was still having to use a shield. Despite pumping and fenugreek I'm barely able to get 2 ounces. The dr. thinks that with the stress of work and school and pumping like crazy that my body just couldn't keep up. The most important thing is for Aidan to be healthy. Dr. Stephens wants her up to 14lbs by Christmas.

I know I've given it all I have but it's so hard not to feel guilty. I wanted everyone to know so they don't think it's weird when they see me not nursing. It's odd because I know that I don't think less of a mother who's bottle feeding but I somehow think less of myself. I just never thought it would be an issue.

Anyways enough doom and gloom, Aidan will be fine and so will I. So anyone have any formula suggestions? We've been using the Similac ready to feed kind to supplement but it's sooo expensive. I've only tried powder once and Aidan was not a fan.

And I ran...I ran so far away...

Aidan when Mommy's in charge

Aidan when Daddy's in charge.
Hello Flock of Seagulls.

Leggo my Eggo...

So I've been taking fenugreek to try and increase my milk supply. For several days I could swear I smelled maple syrup. Finally, I did the old armpit sniff test...and it's me! I smell like syrup. I checked and it's one of the side effects of taking that much fenugreek. While, I am sure there are worse smells in the world it's still a little odd. I probably should not have admitted to this and just let everyone think it was the newest scent from Bath and Body Works. Although, if you are that close to my armpit we may have other issues to discuss.

Aidan at Josh and Aubrey's (shocked by my syrup confession)

"I'm not a woman any more...I'm a mom"

I have a confession to make. A few days ago, in full view of my impressionable infant daughter...I almost purchased a pair of Mom jeans. I know...I'm so ashamed.

I could never understand why someone would voluntarily wear denim parachute pants until I had a baby. Suddenly every pair of jeans I try on is low rise and pushed down by this weird belly that seems to have a mind of its own. I was about to give up and purchase a pair of relaxed fit jeans. They fit, they were comfortable, and Aidan was getting impatient.

Then I turned around and looked at my rear...and marched right back into the dressing room determined to find a better pair. I succeeded, and now I can sleep at night.

Well, when Aidan says I can.

My life is a venn diagram...

I live in three separate worlds: mommy land, work, and school. I'm finding it so difficult to manage all three. Someone gave me the advice that when I'm with Aidan I should think only of her, when I'm at work just think about work etc. I've tried that. But when I'm rocking my baby to sleep I can't help but think about the 5 page paper I have due. When I'm trying to focus on learning something new at work my mind drifts to wondering what Aidan is doing, if she knows that I'm not there. There's just no way to keep these worlds from overlapping. I feel like I could manage any two of these worlds, but three is kicking my butt (sorry Mom).

I keep telling myself that I can do anything for a year. Most of the time I'm okay. I just keep moving, thinking only about the next 5 minutes, the next hour. But sometimes, like today, it catches up with me and I feel so overwhelmed.

Sometimes I think that God is trying to teach me a lesson about how precious time is. I can't help but think of all the time I wasted doing absolutely NOTHING. Maybe I'm paying for it now.

This is one of those posts that I will probably be embarrassed about tomorrow. But I feel better putting my feelings into words.

Incidentally Venn diagrams are one of the few things that I ever learned in math class that I actually retained and understood. So thank you Sequoyah Middle School, you did not teach in vain.